In like Flynt, out like trout

Ah, the holidays. A time for family and exchanging presents and eating good food.

And it's also a time for family arguments, aggravating travel and being hung over from not only alcohol but the good food, too.

You know that when it hits November you start to think about when you can take off work. For me it's always been hard because on my small staff everyone wants to take off at the same time, but you just can't do that in a newsroom. But most people are cool and we work it out with each other. The worst part is trying to figure out just how many days off you have left.

I use the term "days off" specifically. To me, if you're out of work, youre out of work. Doesn't matter if you're in Barbados, if you have the swine flu or if it's Yom Kippur. If you're out you're out. Not to my company.

Our HR department gives you "vacation days," "floating holidays" (whatever the fuck that means) and (unwritten but accepted) "sick days." Vacation days you can bank, floating holidays you can't and sick days are luck of the draw. It's horrendously confusing, and makes absolutely no sense to me. You call HR and want to take five days off during Christmas/New Years and they tell you, "Well you only have two vacation days and one floating holidays left." Well that's great; I'm taking off anyway! The stupid way this system is set up means that for me to take off for the five days, I'm taking my two vacation days, one floating holiday and then rounding off my vacation with two sick days. I'm sorry, but this is ridiculous.

A day off is a day off. Why the hell can't an HR department just tell every employee you get, say, 14 days off for vacation, total, and we'll cut you some slack if you're sick. Or, even simpler: you get 21 days off a year; use them at your disposal. It's just too confusing to figure all of this out, especially in an environment where nobody punches a clock and staff ROUTINELY works 50 and 60 hours a week. We deserve our days off. I don't care if you call them Going-to-Vegas-to-get-a-Hooker days.